Where's the space-corn when I need it?

[skandrae]

I'm a revolting and sweaty mess, but I can't seem to pry myself out of the chair and into the shower. Woe.

I've been reading, reading, trying to wrap my head around concepts that are new to me but which seem like I should already know them. I feel like I need to go back to school, but fear I would not be a worthy student.

I need a fairy godparent with a bag full of monies to appear on my doorstep, tout suite.